Skipping Birthday

A friend messaged me yesterday afternoon, asking me if I'm gonna order some beer for my birthday cause the dealer was there. I was gonna answer no cause I'm having thoughts of skipping a birthday bash but I thought twice and answered yes. I'm opting on a night out of town and pampering myself for some nice shopping and splurging on food instead.

I'm gonna jump on the last trip to Manila on Friday and meet some friends then party till dawn. Then followed by food trip and shopping the next day. Hmmm sounds fun, but that's not me. I want my birthdays in company of friends. What am I thinking? I'm really fucking weird these days. I enjoyed the boob tube this weekend, which I rarely do. I went home Saturday and Sunday from gimmick, morning and noon repectively. (Well, that's not kinda weird.) And I'm sober - That's not truly weird. Hahaha.

I remembered my 98 friends. We had a small get together last Saturday. I was there, physically speaking but I am mentally absent. They tried to cheer me up to no avail. I was really out of my mind that time. I was really spaced out that time, I'm sorry guys. They even planned that we'll gonna meet this coming Saturday to celebrate my birthday. But I'm still doubting if it will push through. Anyways thanks to them for cheering me up and planning for my day.

It's rare to have my birthday on exactly Friday the 13th. I want it to be a bash. But I still have no mental plan about the party itself then how it can be a bash? I don't want to rely on spontaneity alone. I want it planned 75% at least. But up to now I'm still doubting to have a birthday bash. I dunno.

 

Haiz. Gotta see "sandalan" maybe he can put some sense in my mind. Maybe tomorrow my mind's gonna clear and my mood gonna swing to the opposite end.